Fleet Marine Life #96 – Payday Millionaire
Payday Millionaires (aka Weekend Millionaire) are the most financially retarded people ever. They’re the guys who get paid one day and are broke the next day. As a Marine, I’ve seen them all the time. In fact, they’re everywhere in the Corps. Chances are that one is probably living next door to you.
The Marine Corps is filled with young men and women who have never held a job that gives free food, free medical, free dental, free housing, free water, free transportation for some places, free electricity and gives at least $800 on the first and 15th of every month. With all that free shit, the $800 can go to whatever the heart desires and it usually does. When people buy expensive and unnecessary goods, they rationalize their decision by saying things like, “Well if I buy this then it’ll help me in life.” You know damn well you don’t need a two used cars and a motorcycle as a single Marine.
Every payday, I see long lines of cars and fancy trucks outside the gas station. I see Marines and Marine wives crowding the on-base ATMs so that they can get money to spend out of town. I see PXs packed nut-to-butt with everyone and their momma waiting to get the latest gizmo and gadget.
The sad thing is that when Marines live paycheck to paycheck they fail to have anything in their savings. What happens if there is an emergency and all of the sudden you need $2,000 to fly back home from Okinawa? Who the hell is going to loan you $2,000?
Do not loan any of these broke parasites money. You are throwing your money into a black hole. Not even being trapped 28 days of the month in the barracks is enough to deter these young Marines from their excessive spending habits. The only way for these people to fix themselves is an epiphany of biblical proportions.
Honestly, I don’t know how these “millionaires” fix themselves. I’ve never been broke in the Corps. Not even close. It’s very easy to save up a shit ton of money in the Corps but first you have to realize that you don’t need 95% of the shit you buy. Once you start underconsuming, you start saving. You can use those savings to buy several books on investing and learn to invest your money and make more money. For most people, this is too much work and I’m just talking out of my asshole like Ace Ventura.
We live in a time today where each new generation of adults live through overconsumption and excessive materialism. This life style is self-destructive and goes against everything us Americans have valued in the past. What ever happened to saving and frugal living? It’s been replaced by vain people who spend their way into massive debt and believe that their problems will be magically figured out in the future.
It kills me to see my generation burdened with debt caused by themselves. I refuse to be one of them and you can too.
Getting paid on one day and being broke the next day since 1775.
I remember being in the check cashing line on payday with all the classes at MOS school at Camp Johnson. Everyone was talking about the shit they were going to blow their money on. I was holding two checks and people started asking, “How did you get two checks? What’s that other one for?” And I said, “Oh this is my current paycheck and this other is my LAST paycheck.” They fucking shit their pants!! How on Earth did I not blow it the first weekend after I got it on strippers, tattoos and beer?!?!? How did I not cash it for two whole weeks?!?!?! What a bunch of idiots. Then they all wanted to borrow some, just like you said. Shitbags to the extreme, and predators as well…and they were Pvts and PFCs just starting their careers as shitbags. Later, I partied my ass off in Oki and STILL saved $2000 to get a car when I got back to the States. Smarter than the average bear since 1988…
One awesome comic after another. Amazing job!
I used to read terminal lance a lot because it was kind of funny. but now it is just a well drawn piece of shit. this comic really talks about the truth instead of trying to make some gunny laugh and buy a print…
Thank you for your REAL service! I salute you (people getting saluted by me is a rare occurrence)
Haha, thanks.